I Don't Know Nothin' Bout Birthin' No Babies, Miss Scarlett

But somehow they lived. I love the Internet.

Emma had 5 puppies last night!! It was a long process, but I LOVED it. Emma did really well and whelped those babies like a pro. She is now extra ferocious and will probably maim you before you are able to even look at them. She literally could tear my face off and not care. But the second you are able to get her away from them, she is Old Emma...meaning she will only eat Eamon's face off. I have to distract her with a hand, which she will lunge at, and grab her by the scruff of the neck to separate them. It's risky....

Here are some gratuitous before and after shots of my lovely doggy.


Okay, here's what you really wanna see.... I've named the dogs ABC names, just to keep them in line, we'll change them later....

This is the first little guy. His name is Arthur. His birth was the most anticipated, as he was the first. He's a little smaller than the rest, but not by much. He looks probably the most like his dad. He is super cute and has a cute little white spot on the tip of his tail. Definitely a keeper.

This here gem of a puppy is Brenda. She had us worried when Emma bit her cord a little too short. When she finally ripped through it, it literally spurted out and I was freaked out. Brandon was going to tie it off, but it was basically the puppy belly button flesh and a little dangle of shredded cord at the end. I had to pinch it off with my gloves. Poor baby bled quite a bit. Before the styptic pen arrived, it had kinda sealed itself up and she was out of the woods. She is really feisty and was eager to eat during the ordeal, regardless of the hands surrounding her, keeping her alive.

This little cutey is Carl. He had a rather uneventful birth and we made sure the cord issue didn't happen again by having me reach up a little ways up into Emma to pull on the cord a bit to cut it ourselves. It was super strong. Since I wasn't able to pull the afterbirth out, I got a good grip, pulled a little and tore it enough that we could get him away and take care of him. He's a super healthy little guy that also looks like dad.

This little peach is Dana. (Look, I just came up with the first names I could think of that started with that letter, so get over it) Emma did a great job with her too, so we didn't have to much to worry about with her. She is so beautiful.

Our girthy boy came next. It took a full hour for little Edgar (aka Eamon Jr.) to come out. After the delivery and clean up of Dana, I had all 4 pups in a heated basket to keep their temps up. I sat with Emma waiting to see when she would start contractions again. They started up about 15-20 minutes after delivery, like all the others, but she acted unhappy, and actually left her whelping box to come sit on me. She let me feel her and the other puppy and try to manipulate it. She seemed worried. I also got worried after awhile. I decided to let the other puppies nurse to calm Emma down while I searched the Internet for answers. I was feeling nervous and wondering if I should take her to a vet. A few minutes later, I looked at her and little Edgar was already out except for his head.

He was kinda stuck there for a little bit and I knew Emma would kill me if I tried to help, so I watched and waited. Finally, he was out, but he had inhaled fluid. He was purple around the face and feet and I was scared. I worked on cleaning out his lungs (took forever it seemed) and then finally gave him to Emma. She cleaned him up, but he still was pretty cold, so I laid out the other puppies for her to see and when she left him behind, I put him in the warm basket. He finally was warm and I was relieved.

By the way, all the first 4 pups weighed 4 oz. I think Arthur is a hair smaller, but about the same. Edgar was 6 oz, therefore he is a giant compared to the other babies....
Here's a picture of the "dog pile" ha aha haaha hahha hahaah ahahaa
I put a clean rag in for your benefit....(not really, but I like to flatter) This photo has them looking downright angelic.
Oooo, I love my puppies!!

The Life and Times of Pregnant Emma

Here's a few pictures of Emma over the last few days. The ones of her standing are from Sunday and she got MUCH bigger of the next few days. She kept hiding under our bed. The gap from the wood to the floor is really small, but somehow she would squeeze herself under it, regardless of the fact that she had a perfectly good whelping box...blah. I would have to call her and make her come out. I wasn't too keen on the idea of the birth liquids on my floor under my bed. It truly is a miracle that she could get out on Thursday when she did.

Drowning in the Hole?

Me: (calling to Eamon in the bathroom) Eamon, are you going poo?

E: Yeah, and I can see the whole thing, and it's drowning in the hole, and I can see the whole thing. (-pause-) Okay, I'm done!

Good Times!!

In case you didn't know (you didn't), I was on a Super Girls Trip to Las Vegas last Wednesday - Friday night. Of course, I haven't posted it, but Arianne, who is no slacker, has a superb recounting of our adventures together. Check it out! I might add my 2 cents later here. But she did a great job. It's chock full of laughter, tears, gas....And that was just me.

And everything she says about me, assume I was right..ha

Though I am not new to a hiatus from the blog (I take one every week....sorry) I will warn you about this one. I'm off to Girls Camp with the Young Women from our ward from Tues - Sat.

"Good times!" - Jerri Blank

Father's Day on a Unicycle

On Father's Day, we could hear the kids going up and down the stairs, and little whispers, "Shhh, don't wake Daddy...C'mon! Hurry" A little while later, they came down with an envelope. There was a drawing of a snake by Eamon...


Another drawing by Cam (Bran doing a jump on his skateboard, a snake, and Bran working on his car)

And on the back this....

There was also about $1.50 in change in the envelope...So sweet.

As for Bran's gifts from me:

A few weeks ago, Brandon sent me the video below and was all "jazzed" about it. ha Through a friend, I saw this t-shirt based on the clip. It's from the old BMX movie "Rad". As an early Father's Day gift, I gave it to him last week so he could wear it on his boys' trip to Vegas. He loved it. Here's a clip of the scene from the shirt.... WATCH IT. So bad it's good.







He also got a book called Salt Lake City: Then and Now. It shows pictures of old buildings in Salt Lake taken when they were built, and what they look like now or what is in their place if they've been demolished. He got a vintage light meter, and at the same store, I found found this beauty.....


It's an old Sears & Roebuck unicycle. He replaced the tire and gave it a whirl. Hilarity ensues.... This video is like 3 1/2 min. long, but at least watch the first minute.

And to Papa Seth, we're so glad you're our Dad, and we could spend it with you... Happy Father's Day.

It's Official

Remember the post where I was talking about getting my dog knocked up?

I felt them moving in there today. Next week (I'll be away all week for Girls Camp) we'll get an x-ray done to see how many puppies she'll have.

(Brandon is not holding her by the nape of her neck. She is standing and he's holding her up....We're not MEAN)

Can your husband do THIS with chopsticks?

Didn't think so....

Johnny 5 Alive

My kids watched Short Circuit the other day...."Disassemble!!" "Need more inpuuut..."

This is what they made with a couple of boxes and my kitchen shears.

Cam's had a 5 on the side, while Eamon opted for a 4.

Bizarro Us

My sister was trying to look up our blog by typing it in opposite the way it is, and found this...

brandonandcara.blogspot.com/

It's Bizarro us!!! And they were in Turkey (where we were last year!!!) Wow!

Here's the proof...

And the Award for Most Improved goes to.....

Brandon! Everybody clap!!!


I guess I should preface this with a story about the first time I called Brandon after we met. It was evening, and he was in the bathtub at his Grandma's. I can maybe imagine that she might have been giving his back a good scrub down, because a man taking a bath is very strange to me. Especially when he tells me he takes one every night. Every woman I know says that a bath is a luxury. We rarely get to take them. But Brandon is a man who takes his bathing seriously.
Anyway, he has always done this. Cameron and Eamon took 9 months to conceive. The last pregnancy only took 6, woo hoo... We didn't know why it took so long, but whatever.... So after I had a miscarriage a year and a half ago, my sister-in-law Sara told me that a hot bath was terrible on a man's fertility. I kind of suspected that already, but this was like the little push I needed to get serious about it. I told him he needed to stop taking his hot baths, and that maybe they were why it took us so long to get pregnant in the first place. Long story short, he would not. And yes, maybe a lot of it was him getting back at me for being a bad wife or housekeeper. Whatever...

But after many times of hearing him say, "Hey, we have 2 kids, it can't be me" or "How do you know it's not you?" and one LONG a$$ year going by, I finally had an exam by my OB-GYN. Brandon then agreed to have a semen analysis, as suggested by my doctor. Can I just tell you the results were DEPRESSING....
His fertility score of 6 was almost the lowest it could be.
25-30=normal, 16-24=moderate, less than 15=low.
So would 6=the lowest of the low?


Can I just tell you that Brandon stopped the baths that day!!?

The test suggested reasons, and one was a varicose vein of the testicle, sometimes incurred through trauma. Could Brandon think of a time when he had experienced trauma to the testicle? YES, at least a couple of occasions skating on rails actually. So here was our probable answer. Brandon isn't too keen on having a surgery to remove this vein, and I can't blame him. His doctor suggested laying off the hot baths for 3 months to rule that out as well, and maybe they were what was exacerbating the problem of the varicose vein. Do you follow? Do you want to follow? Sorry.

So like a good boy (and like most of the human race), Brandon has been taking showers all spring. Every time I hear the shower going, it's like a love letter written just for me.

Fast forward 3 months. I had written us off as a low-fertility couple. I was going to call my doctor to ask what the procedure is for artificial insemination and when could we get started. I had resigned myself. The nurse from his doctor's office calls today and I say, "Oh, you have the test back already? What does it say?"

"He's at a 30 fertility score, which is the highest it goes."

I wanted to ask her if Brandon's test had been switched with someone else's...I didn't. So I called Brandon and let him read the fax of the results before I said anything. He read it and was shocked as well. I said, "How do you feel?"

"Happy."

"And...." (I'm waiting for it)

"Excited," and I can hear the smile on his face.

"And....How else do you feel..." (still waiting)

"Um, proud....?"

"What about guilty?"

"Nope."

Almost conclusive medical proof of him being a selfish bas*&$# and he has nothing to say to me....About me being right all along. About how sorry he is for putting me through H-E-double hockey sticks for a year. About how I'm always right and how he wants nothing more than to apologize with flowers and back rubs and staying away from his car for one night. I'm still waiting...

I think I'm still not excited. I'm still in shock over all of this crap. It's crazy stuff.

(By the way, I received permission to post this)